We blessed Ryker on Sunday. I don't know if our ward has ever had that many visitors at one time. Thank you to all the family and friends that came and supported us (over 70 people). And now, time for some Q and A with myself...
Q: Lisa, I was looking online today and I noticed there was a part time 2nd grade teacher opening at your school. Did you kill someone?
A: I did not. My husband started to fear dying in his sleep if he didn't let me cut down to part time.
Q: Won't you be hungry from lack of all that money you make as a teacher?
A: Of course not, people eat grass all the time. Kidding of course, I actually made Brandon sell both his kidneys.
Q: Speaking of Brandon, what is he up to?
A: About 5'9"
Q: Why wasn't Ryker's blessing outfit white for Sunday?
A: Because I'm untraditional. Plus I think white is girly, and my baby is a MAN CHILD whose masculinity shall not be compromised.
Q: What's the neuroticism focus this week?
A: Flat heads. I'm very concerned Ryker is going to have a flat head and have to wear one of those helmets.
Q: How's your diet and exercise program going?
A: In short, it's not. I have a problem and I'm not afraid to admit it. I was born with a medical need of a daily dessert. It's true. If I do not have a something sweet and chocolately daily, I get the shakes. It's a terrible diagnosis, and unfortunately, it's terminal.
Q: Don't you think that you should be cleaning your house right now, especially because your baby is asleep and your husband is at work?
A: Of course not, it's Monday. I never clean on Mondays. It would only make Mondays worse. Thursday is cleaning day. Thursdays I clean so that Fridays I can come home and relax for the weekend and not have to clean. It's a very complicated system. If I get off schedule it could potentially screw up my whole week.
Q: How is Brandon's "problem"?
A: Unfortunately things are getting worse. I asked him if he had a good time at the game the other night after BYU had lost, and he told me to quit nagging him and go to bed. The next morning I found actual written notes he had taken of different players' stats so he could use them whilst staying up all night on Cougarboard. At that point, all I could do was pity him.
Q: You are so witty as always. Just one more question. What are you most excited about tonight?
A: I am excited about the sickeningly big (but still believable) black rubber spider that I took away from one of my kids at school that I have carefully placed in the corner behind the toilet for Brandon to see when he gets home. It will be hilarious. He's easy to scare, he hates spiders, and he screams like a girl. Trifecta, you betcha.
HAHAHA
ReplyDeleteokay so...
Q: Why do you talk to yourelf in the third person?!
A: I don't, Lisa does!
Q: Do you think Brandon really sold his kidneys?
A: No, Brandon is so caring he would just donate them. Not sell them! They were probably Lisa's kidneys she sold and just doesn't want us to know!
Q:Would Lisa, or Brandon even survive without both their kidneys?
A:Probably not. Now we know it wasn't true!
Q: WHO'S CHILD IS THAT ON THE HILL!!??
No Answer...
I'm so glad your blog it back, it makes me laugh! Concerning the flat head thing, if you'll notice my child's head is nice and round...that would be because we ignored the caution of the medical world and put him to sleep on his stomach. He did not die of SIDS, his head is nice and round, and an added bonus..he slept better. I wouldn't worry too much though, Ryker's head is looking nice and round to me.
ReplyDeleteOkay, you forgot one question.....it's actually for Brandon.
ReplyDeleteQ: How and WHY did you allow a man wearing a U of U necktie to stand in Ryker's blessing circle? Wouldn't that prohibit the Spirit from being there?
A: